I accidentally angered a psychic

First Congregational Church

I’m not superstitious.

Sure, I knock on wood when something could jinx me, and I throw salt over my shoulder when I upset the shaker. And there was the Great Fortune Cookie Scare of 2011. I see my little rituals as quirks, though, since I don’t really believe they change the dynamics of the universe.

tarot card quotationI mulled this over as I drove to get a psychic reading. I go by the place all the time, and the pretty engraved wooden sign always catches my eye. I was curious about whether the “psychic” would be an outright con artist, or whether she would truly believe she could tell the future.

I didn’t know whether I should pretend to believe. I decided as I walked up the steps to just be honest. A little nervous, I rang her bell.  I didn’t hear it ring and tried it again before knocking. Still no answer.

I walked away vaguely disappointed, but a little relieved too and thought I might as well get a picture of the sign while I was there.

I took a few shots before being interrupted by an annoyed shout: “Can I help you?”

“Oh, hi!” I beamed. “Are you doing psychic readings?”

“Yes. Why are you taking pictures of my sign?”

“Hi,” I said. “I tried your doorbell.”

“What are you doing taking pictures of my sign?”

“I think it’s pretty,” I said.

“But why are you taking pictures of it?”

“I drive by it all the time, and I like it,” I said. This was true.

“You just go around taking pictures of things you like?”

“Yes,” I said, which was true again.

“I don’t understand why you’re taking pictures of it.”

“My dad used to do woodworking,” I said. “I like the beveled edges.”

She scowled at me.

What nefarious reason could I have for taking pictures of her sign? And if I did have a nefarious reason, shouldn’t she of all people know about it?

“I tried your bell, and there was no answer. Sorry. Was it wrong to take a photo?” I asked.

“No, it’s just weird for you to go around taking photos of my sign.”

“You give psychic readings, and it’s weird for me to take photos?”

Full disclosure: I didn’t say that last part.

Then it was time to get down to business. I selected the walk-in special, a $10 tarot card reading. I can declare I’m not superstitious all I want, but it’s still ominous to hand over ten bucks to someone to tell me my future.

“When was your last reading?” she asked.

“Never,” I said. Again, the truth, but she looked even more suspicious.

Great, a pissed off psychic now held my future in her hands.

She spread out the tarot cards and asked me to choose three. For each card, I had to ask a question. I clearly made up the first question off the top of my head, which annoyed her further. I asked whether my kids would go to college, chose the middle card, and flipped it over.

She threw in some mumbo-jumbo with her answer, and I was still rattled about the sign, so I missed the gist of it.

“Sorry, was that a yes?” I asked.

“Yes, I said yes at the beginning.” This was not going to get any friendlier.

For my second question, I asked if my mother was happy, curious if this chestnut would bring out any particularly psychic declarations. I flipped over the card on the left. She answered simply that my mother is happy where she is, not giving any indication whether she thought she was living or dead.

For my final question, I asked whether I would retire early. I flipped over the card on the right. The tarot card was upside down, which I thought significant based on my knowledge of creepy TV psychics, but it didn’t faze her. She said I would retire early, but that I’m the type of person who would stay busy. I was grateful to escape any gloom and doom predictions.

I had a strong impulse to take a quick picture of the three tarot cards. I let it pass.

As I got ready to leave, I offered to delete the photos of her sign, and she repeated that she just thought it was weird. At that point, I almost mentioned that I might be writing about it on my blog, but she was so annoyed, I just got the heck out of there.

Since I didn’t ask her permission, I won’t be sharing a picture of her pretty engraved wooden sign and instead shared a picture of my town square.

I drive by it all the time and think it’s pretty, so I stopped and took a picture of it.

This scene from the excellent HBO show Carnivale has the eerie atmosphere I was imagining when I went for a tarot card reading, but my psychic had a perfectly mundane dining room with a vacuum cleaner in the corner. If you’re looking to binge-watch a TV show, Carnivale was amazing–until HBO canceled it prematurely. (Video link)

Witch wand New Orleans strip

MultiMEDIA Splice #4: Superstition

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{Next week’s theme: Review. Year in review, holiday review, movie review, musical  review…?}

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101 things in 1001 days Beyond 101 things

About Marcy

I blog about trying to get out of my comfort zone, completing 101 things in 1001 days (and beyond), and writing my memoirs. My book: Timid No More.
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11 Responses to I accidentally angered a psychic

  1. Carol apple says:

    I love it. Sounds like the exact sort of thing that would happen to me. She sounds awfully defensive, like she is suspicious a picture of her sign could be used against her somehow. You could have told her you might blog about and give her free advertising but it sounds like maybe she wouldn’t have been so receptive to the idea. I confess I went to couple psychics when I was young and trying to figure out what I believed. One told me I would be working with horses in the future. The closest I came was I tried once to draw a horse. The other told me I would have a daughter. I have two sons.

  2. Abby says:

    Y’know, I’ve always kind of wanted to have a psychic reading, just to see what would happen. But I think a grumpy psychic with a vacuum cleaner in the room would ruin it for me! And that was a fun clip. I’d never heard of Carnivale.

  3. Clearly, she had issues with you taking pictures of her sign 😉

    And yeah, did she finally give any answer which satisfied you? Nope, I think not. Although, to be honest, it did make for a great blog post, so I guess you got something out of it 😀
    Shailaja/ The Moving Quill recently posted..The Colour WhiteMy Profile

    • Marcy says:

      Thanks–I do enjoy getting posts out of my unpleasant experiences. I still don’t get why she was so upset. She welcomed walk-in visitors, and it’s just a sign. I was glad she didn’t take it out on my future 😉

  4. TriGirl says:

    Well that was weird. You would think that a psychic might believe in karma. You were kind to not share her sign, since it wouldn’t really be good press. I’m glad you got a blog post out of it. Maybe the next psychic will be more fun!
    TriGirl recently posted..I Ran a Marathon. Whoopee. (The marathon aftermath)My Profile

  5. Kei says:

    Sounds like a pretty questionable psychic to be honest. I’m by no means skeptic but unless a psychic can deliver information that is accurate and unique (rather than vague and one-size-fits-all) I find it hard to be convinced. And I’ve experienced both! (One told me I’d be getting a certificate soon, which was easy enough to guess as I was visibly college/university age, whilst another psychic medium told me some things about my grandad that there’s no way she would have known, or guessed)

    As for the psychic you saw, if she was geniune, she needs to brush up on her social skills when dealing with clients! At least she didn’t give you doom and gloom, which is in her favour.
    Kei recently posted..Nacho PartyMy Profile

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